Lambrusco Is the Best Wine 

Rosé? Not today. Get out of my way. There’s but one sparkling
alcoholic bev for which I’ll pay: it’s Lambrusco.

I was recently informed that Lambrusco is the new drink trend,
and am experiencing my first official case of I Liked It Before
It Was Cool. For years, I’ve had to withstand the sneers and
jeers over cheese plates from jokers who can’t tell the
difference between a frizzante Tuscan vintage and carbonated
grape juice. No, I’m not a child drinking
soda from a bottle. I’m a Woman! A woman who
loves wine that tastes like it’s dancing in your mouth!

The Rosé Lifestyle Domination Is All
Instagram’s Fault

Hey, good afternoon, hello, it’s summer, and that means
you’re this close to shoving off and…

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Sadly, a dip into #Lambrusco on Instagram and Twitter shows
evidence that the preferred drink of my Italian grandparents is
about to get absorbed by the influencers. They’re dressing it
up in denim and pairing
it
with Doritos, for chrissake:

Even local celebrities are mentioning it:

I don’t begrudge anyone discovering something new and
delicious, certainly; but with the rise in its popularity, my
relationship with Lambrusco must necessarily change. In the
past, I’ve brought Lambrusco to parties and watched people
circle around it to grab the more familiar pink and white
frothy wines, or opt for a staid, flat pinot noir. Their
anxiety about consuming four ounces of fruit-forward wine meant
more for me. I have brought and drunk entire bottles of
Lambrusco at events for years, but the gravy train has been
derailed.

If the trend continues and I’m forced to share, I expect other
people to start bringing some. So here are my favorite and very
dry (secco) and delicious Lambruscos. Please plan
accordingly.


Lini 910 Lambrusco Rosso
is always a crowdpleaser for those
who dare to sample something new and be pleased. It also
features a charming image of Dionysus relaxing in his crown of
grapes and a loose bed sheet. It even looks aged, like a scroll
directing you to a bacchanalian orgy.

“Is this a secret message from Lini 910?” you’ll ask yourself
in the mirror, completely hammered.

End of list. Actually,
these

ones
are all
pretty good
, too. But don’t try to pass off seltzer and
cabernet mixed together—I’ll know!

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